


Rations

by theonetryingtolive



Category: Ad Astra (2019)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Eating Disorders, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, trigger warning eating disorders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:41:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29713893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theonetryingtolive/pseuds/theonetryingtolive
Summary: TW: Eating DisorderYou nodded. It was unexpected, difficult to understand even, but this was Roy. And for him you’d move mountains.
Relationships: Roy McBride/Reader
Kudos: 1





	Rations

Roy came back starved and restless. Every meal time you gently nudged him to have some more food, to stop eating like he was back up there with a dwindling reserve of rations. Every afternoon it was a battle to get him calm enough to lay in bed next to you. Still, even after so much time, there were nights in which you fell asleep only to wake up the next morning and find him still awake, looking out at the soft, blue morning light. 

Roy looked almost scared in those early morning hours. You could see the tension in his back from your place on the bed. He stood by the window, motionless, looking out at the vast fields of green.

“Roy?” You asked in a soft voice, sitting up slowly. 

You couldn’t help but notice the way in which his frame seemed to curve inwards, how his chest, his stomach, his lower belly seemed to sunk into himself. You bit your lip, trying to come up with something to say that hadn’t been said before. 

“I was back up there,” he murmured, his hands clenching the windowsill harder than before. You could see his muscles coil as he did. So much tension, so much pain.

“Can I touch you?” You asked in a soft voice. He nodded and you carefully wrapped an arm around him, squeezed him back to yourself even though you were shorter than him. A shuddering breath broke free from his chest and you rubbed slow circles on his hipbone. The bone jutted out too much for your liking and you pressed a kiss to his back. “You don’t have to live like this anymore, Roy.”

He placed a hand on top of yours, gave it a squeeze. “I didn’t want to worry you.”

“Talk to me,” you murmured, kissing his back once again. “Tell me how I can help.”

He closed his eyes for a few seconds, inhaling deeply. “I need to stop thinking about rations. I need to- I need to stop thinking you’re going to die if I don’t ration everything.”

You nodded. It was unexpected, difficult to understand even, but this was Roy. And for him you’d move mountains. 

“We’ll take it slow. Just you and me. Why don’t you think of it in a different way? Maybe think that’s everything I put on your plate is your ration. All of it, not just half of it. Not just a quarter.”

He gave your hand another little squeeze. “I’d like to try.”

“Good. Then we will. And if it doesn’t work, then we try something else.”

You could hear the smile on his voice. “You’re in charge, Commander.”

You laughed. “We’ll figure it out, Major.”


End file.
